Chinese New Year
When I was much younger, I was always anticipating the occasion. Always glad to meet up with cousins that I do not see all the time, looking forward to playing games (Such as hide and seek, when you were young, everything was simple yet blissful). I would look forward to the yearly trips we would make to Chinatown every year, to soak in the hustle and bustle, to pick out our favourite candies and jellies.
When we were still at my previous house, we would cook up a scrumptious meal and everyone would gather there. After dinner, the adults would sit on the sofas and engage in adult talk while the rest of us, being kids, played our own games.
As we grew older, of course things start to change.
I’m no longer the kid that derives the same joy I did from playing hide and seek, or catching. I no longer open my red packets (This has been going on for more than 5 years), or at least since the start of secondary school life. It no longer piques my curiosity in knowing how much my relatives would give me because I would handover the red packets to my mum, and I think she keeps them and save it up for us. Nah, I don’t resent that, in fact, I’m thankful for it, because it would mean that my money, for about 18 years of my existence is growing somewhere in a bank. It would have been better than me keeping it and eventually spending it away on frivolous items that would probably get used for a short while, and then forgotten or thrown away.
But CNY gatherings, have become less meaningful.
Yes, you still do communicate with those that you were always close to. But to those that you are relatively distant, you end up engaging in only small talk or even not speak at all. I find myself extremely guilty of this. I end up talking only to those I find myself more comfortable with and if they are not around, I just build up this wall around myself by engaging with my electronic device.
CNY just seems to be an excuse to gather together, just for the sake of it. And it doesn’t really help that this year, everything happened too quickly and went by too quickly, hence there is a lack of festive mood, and now I’m feeling empty.
I’m also pretty sick of the CNY goodies. Bakwa, pineapple tarts, cornflake cookies, my all time favourite. But now, I’ve eaten significantly less. I’ve not touched more than 10 pineapple tarts this year, despite my aunt baking the best pineapple tarts ever.
Well, at least I know I will not put on lots of extra unwanted weight ;)
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